There’s a little Seinfeld reference to you fellow aholics! Love is a curious and splendor thing. We start out very young learning that “love” is that goofy feeling you get when he/she passes you in the hall. Then we learn that “love” is the way a person looks at you and you feel like melting in your seat. Then we find out that touching a special someone or even better…having them touch us is sheer ecstasy. I won’t follow too much more the physical part of love…I will let you discover that on your own or have someone else tell you about that. But then we find that that physical love and being “in love” is really just a predecessor to the even truer of loves. I heard a phrase the other day “When you make love to a person, your body makes a commitment to them” That is why so many people confuse this physical love with a deeper love that our bodies were engineered to strive for. Loving someone when they are gross or rude or mean or even when you don’t really like the person. Any relationship will have it hills and valleys. Some days are diamonds, some are black chunks of coal. But it is the love that binds us through commitment that lasts. A physical love will pass within a few hours, but the love that holds people together for 60+ years, is something we should all strive to achieve. Will it be perfect and without conflict? Absolutely not! Will it be blissful evenings in each others arms by the fire? Not always! But it will be kind, forgiving, patient, long suffering…does this sound familiar? God knew what he was dong when he made us and exactly what our needs were going to be and how to deal with them. So read up on the elements of love and see how they describe you and your part of your relationship. Don’t worry about the other half of your relationship, you get yours right, and then they will learn from you!Friday, January 1, 2010
"Love and war...what's it for?"
There’s a little Seinfeld reference to you fellow aholics! Love is a curious and splendor thing. We start out very young learning that “love” is that goofy feeling you get when he/she passes you in the hall. Then we learn that “love” is the way a person looks at you and you feel like melting in your seat. Then we find out that touching a special someone or even better…having them touch us is sheer ecstasy. I won’t follow too much more the physical part of love…I will let you discover that on your own or have someone else tell you about that. But then we find that that physical love and being “in love” is really just a predecessor to the even truer of loves. I heard a phrase the other day “When you make love to a person, your body makes a commitment to them” That is why so many people confuse this physical love with a deeper love that our bodies were engineered to strive for. Loving someone when they are gross or rude or mean or even when you don’t really like the person. Any relationship will have it hills and valleys. Some days are diamonds, some are black chunks of coal. But it is the love that binds us through commitment that lasts. A physical love will pass within a few hours, but the love that holds people together for 60+ years, is something we should all strive to achieve. Will it be perfect and without conflict? Absolutely not! Will it be blissful evenings in each others arms by the fire? Not always! But it will be kind, forgiving, patient, long suffering…does this sound familiar? God knew what he was dong when he made us and exactly what our needs were going to be and how to deal with them. So read up on the elements of love and see how they describe you and your part of your relationship. Don’t worry about the other half of your relationship, you get yours right, and then they will learn from you!
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I struggle with the boundries of love. And where to draw the line. I left my husband in 2009, and it was hard. Most days, I'm sure it was the right thing to do...but every now and then, doubt creeps in.
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